Video games taught me a lot. This one in particular taught me if you roll your convertible with the top down, you and your girlfriend will fly out and sit up at the end without serious injury.

Take the quiz and see if you are as savy as Kristina's old roomate...

What do you do with a guy that writes things on dirty walls...by removing the dirt? The police in Leeds, Britain are just as stumped.

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket.

He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to The priest and asked, "Say Father, what causes arthritis?"

The priest replies, "My Son, it's caused by loose living, Being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath."

The drunk muttered in response, "Well, I'll be damned," Then returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what He had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"

The drunk answered, "I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."

Apparently Borat, Ali-G's portrayal of a Kazakhstani reporter, has gone too far. Ali-G's new movie, Borat: Cultural Learnings from America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan, has angered the Kazakhstani government enough to hire 2 PR firms to promote the "real" image of Kazakhstan and to include the topic of Borat in the talks between Kazakhstan president Nursultan Nazarbayev and GW in the coming weeks.

If you don't know Ali-G but for some reason, he seems familiar to you, it is because he sang a song about throwing jews down a well.

Excerpt:

Your life-jacket can be found under your seat, but please do not remove it now. In fact, do not bother to look for it at all. In the event of a landing on water, an unprecedented miracle will have occurred, because in the history of aviation the number of wide-bodied aircraft that have made successful landings on water is zero.

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I know you are all wondering so here is an article that lists a few of them.

Excerpt:

onion booty (US), rectal rooter (US), fart hammer (US), i shot myself (Germany), german pee (France), penis enlargement (Japan), cumshot circus (Egypt)

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This qualifies as one of those "What if" stories. "What if" politicians had to wear the logos of the companies that made donations to their campaigns...

Read along with this interactive German book for kids that explains it all...

Not only does impermeable rock keep out the bad water...it keeps out ALL water. They must be the same ad agency that works for Paul...

Working on the popularity of Hot or Not.com, the TSA is using a new web tool to help train its screeners to spot bombs.

I know you all want to learn to yodel. Well here is the site to use.