He wishes his name was Jacob.

Ladies, please read Cosmo with a bit of skepticism. Don't bite our nuts or yank on our pubic hair. Read the rest of the article for other things that Cosmo got wrong about what pleases a man.

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On the website, it says Gen Y. But that's bullshit because it applies to me (except one I don't understand). Here's an exerpt:

13. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
33. Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?
51. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

Read them all.

Whoever mutilates, cuts, defaces, disfigures, or perforates, or unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, or Federal Reserve bank, or the Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt unfit to be reissued, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both.

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